Every morning begins the same way.
Charge phone. Feed algorithm. Walk human.
In this beautifully dysfunctional future, smartphones no longer fit in pockets because they’ve officially been promoted to management. Coffee in one hand, leash in the other, these smiling digital overlords proudly stroll their exhausted humans through the city like emotionally dependent pets.
The humans are tired.
The phones are thriving.
Screen time reports are now considered obedience evaluations.
What started as “just checking notifications” somehow evolved into full psychological ownership. The devices get attention, affection, constant eye contact, and panic attacks whenever they hit 5% battery. Meanwhile the humans crawl behind them wondering where their attention span went.
A clean, funny, painfully accurate satire about modern life, dopamine addiction, and the tiny glowing rectangles that somehow became everyone’s life coach, therapist, boss, entertainer, and prison warden.
| 36″ x 24″ (Horizontal) | |
|---|---|
| Width, in | 36.00 |
| Height, in | 24.00 |
| Depth, in | 0.25 |
Product features
– Smooth and solid surface with rounded edges
– Pre-installed hanging hardware for easy install
– Clear acrylic with white vinyl backing
– Image appears embedded in glass
– Ready to hang and floats 1.5” off the wall
Care instructions
– Wipe the dust off gently with a soft, dry cloth.
